Why Psychotherapy ?

During the course of life, all of us face situations that require us to adapt, change and overcome/survive. And, for the most part, we humans cope, adjust, and ‘get on’ with life.That is until we no longer find ourselves in the category of ‘for the most part’. This realisation comes to different people in different ways. And, of course, different people react differently to this realisation.

For some, the signs are in their sleeping pattern. For others, the signs are in the dynamics or deterioration of a relationship. In some instances, people who have previously regarded themselves as driven, find that they have become listless. For others, it may be that they are more irritable than usual. In other instances, people say that they behave in ways that are unusual for them. For many, the sign is in a feeling, whether they can specify it or not. Of course, there are times when a person does not notice the signs until someone else – a family member, a friend, or a colleague – brings it to their attention.

In some instances, people pinpoint a specific life-, or traumatic event as the reason. In other instances, people believe that it is a result of frustration with a situation that has been building up. Often though, people are simply unsure and find it difficult to explain the reason or cause of their specific tell-tale signs.

Similarly, people are frequently unsure about how to deal with it, or about what they should do and the thought of consulting a psychologist might cross their minds. Alternatively, someone might recommend that they do so.

For many though, going to a psychologist is not as straightforward as say, going to the doctor. Admittedly, some people find the idea of going to the doctor terrifying. However, most people accept that an occasional visit to the doctor’s office is a normal part of life.

In contrast, many people still believe – to a greater or lesser extent – that it is unusual to see a psychologist. This is unfortunate, as it most definitely can, and does sometimes happen that everyday people find that they are no longer adjusting, coping and ‘getting on’ with life as effectively as they did before.

Apart from the above reactions, there are also people that openly admit that they are cynical (or have doubts) about psychologists, therapy, and/or the usefulness of either. Others say that they fail to see the point in talking about a situation, especially a situation that cannot be reversed or changed: one case in point is having been retrenched, another is the death of a loved one.

Some people are reluctant to go to a psychologist because they worry that it will make them look weak, or that it will somehow reflect negatively on them. Several of my clients have acknowledged that they felt downright embarrassed when they started seeing me. For others, the quandary lies in the fact that people often turn to them for help because other people typically see them as the ‘in control, strong ones’.

There are also many people that are reluctant to go to a psychologist because they believe that they should be able to deal with life’s challenges, difficulties, and trauma by themselves.

In fact, becoming aware of their specific tell-tale signs leads many people to first put pressure on themselves to ‘pull themselves together’, or to ‘try harder’. However, this is easier said than done. It is often after some failed attempts of doing just that, that people start to consider seeing a psychologist. And, importantly, they are right to do so.

When something has happened, or shifted, and you find it difficult to cope and get ‘back on track’, so to speak, it is appropriate to see a psychologist.